hahaha thank you, but i really thought it added a little SOMETHING (barf?) to the semen cocktails story!!
Here's Wine to Enjoy Whilst High and/or During Your Next Pony Party
The folks at SLO Down Wines want you to pair their Sexual Chocolate vinage with pizza, pot, and pony play. I'm listening.
I love twee online boutique ModCloth as much as the next girl who loves adorable shit. If I could afford it, my entire closet would consist of various woodland animals printed on rompers and barrettes shaped like slices of pepperoni pizza. Actually, if I could afford it, I'd just have someone size up Zooey Deschanel's entire The New Girl wardrobe and live inside ModCloth's website — adorably trapped for eternity, doing fashion shows for bunnies in onesies and ponies in corsets.
Chiropractor Cracking Backs Is the Most Uncomfortable Thing Ever
This commercial uses scantily-clad ladies and bone-crunching sound effects to encourage you to visit the shadiest of all shady shadesters: a chiropractor.
Suspension of 31 Kids for Twerking Is Upheld by School Board
In a move that would make Principal Belding look competent, a high school in San Diego suspended 31 students
Kid Safety Manual Will Make You Never Want to Go Outside Again
The 1950s were apparently a terrifying time to be a child. If a train wasn't coming out of nowhere to decapitate you, a seemingly harmless and endlessly fun game of "hide in a pile of leaves!"* ended when you were run over by city workers.
Of all the trend pieces about fake trends, this one claiming that ladies don't love Game of Thrones has got to be one of the dumbest. If I could, I'd sic Brienne of Tarth on them.
Let's all chair dance (the best and easiest type of dancing!) along with these singing, laughing, bopping tots.
GOP Congressman Links Abortions to School Shootings (For Real)
Get a load of this horseshit from Kevin Cramer, one of North Dakota's Republican Congressmen, earlier this month:
